Friday, May 22, 2009

Nothing ordinary about it...

The Church counts the time after Pentecost and before the Christmas Season as Ordinary Time. So between June 1 this year until November 28 life will be ordinary.

I discovered this because as a new Christian I like to study not only the Bible, but Biblical and Church History. I read the above article about Ordinary Time – which really just means 'ordinal' or counted time. But I highly object to that name!!

There is nothing ordinary about following Jesus Christ. Ever since I made the choice to accept Christ into my life I've been living an incredible adventure. Doors have opened that I never expected. People accepted me and my life is filled with those who not only love me, but stand beside me in times of crisis. I see miracles happen all around me every single day - evidence that the Lord works both ends of every situation. I have gained wisdom, and confidence that I never knew I could possess because all of these things were born of the Lord.

Sometimes I almost feel a little sorry for those who have known Jesus their whole lives because I understand that they will never get to feel the thrill of the realization that they are finally honestly FREE from the darkness, and pain in which they used to live. I'm going to keep the joy that 'thrill' gave me forever.

It may well be that the Church counts the time after Pentecost as 'Ordinary Time'. But my life after my own personal Pentecost is anything but ordinary. Life with Jesus is an eternal adventure!

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

My Prayer

Heavenly Father I ask that you never let me forget my life before I was saved.

I never want to forget the utter emptiness in my soul that I tried to fill in all the wrong ways.

I never want to forget the self loathing I felt for the way I was living my life.

I never want to forget the loneliness of my self imposed isolation.

I never want to forget the disappointment of opening my eyes to a new morning when what I longed for was death.

I do not want to forget the overwhelming fear that kept me from leaving my home.

I never want to forget the guilt, and the anxiety and the pain that filled my every waking moment because of how I had failed my children that I could not raise.

I never want to forget the lies, deception and the self denial of my decaying mind.

I am so grateful for your redemption, for now there is no condemnation, and I am free.

I will treasure these dark memories because only through them can I measure how far you've brought me. Through them I can know just how far I've come by your grace alone. And with these memories I can begin to fully understand how great your love is. You never let go of me Lord, no matter how deep I sank. And I never want to forget that.

Thank you Lord for these dark memories. They keep me praising you.